Life is full of things that are annoying or that are cause for concern. Sometimes the things are little; sometimes they are major. This blog will address things that surface for the writer.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Child Protection

This blog has been about things that annoy me. By now, you've gathered that gambling, smoking and child abuse are my top three annoyances. This post continues with the protection of children; and especially about the potential abuse arising from unsupervised computer use.

One of the greatest responsibilities of our society has to be the protection of our children. Unfortunately, as a social worker, I see this as being one area where we fail. Our children are nor financially productive so child protection measures – whether they be child protection laws, resources to protect children or funding to help children in need of protection – are sadly lacking. The result is that we have a large segment of our youth who are children at risk. These children grow up with unnecessary abuse and neglect.

Although there are several areas where children experience child abuse and neglect, this article will focus on only one. Because parents are so busy and a family needs to have two or more jobs to survive, children often are alone for extended periods of time. The companion has become the computer; the friends are known or unknown subscribers to Facebook, MSN, Twitter or other latest social gathering pages; the mentors and counselors are names on these social sites. It is easy for the subscribers to these pages to fabricate their identity; it is easy to pretend to be somebody you’re not; it is easy to be understanding, caring and sympathetic when sitting at a keyboard. It’s easy for a vulnerable child to believe that the person on the other end of the conversation is a friend who will listen. The computer, the internet, and these social sites become an easy tool to lure unsuspecting needy children into a child abuse situation. The child is isolated; the family becomes replaced and the child becomes at risk. Many of these situations have been high profile news items across North America over the years.

This is an area where official child protection measures only come into play after the fact. So parents need to take responsibility for the protection and safety of their children.

If work requires parents to allow their children to be “latchkey children”, then the parents must take steps to ensure their children are safe when home alone and when not supervised at home. Sadly, children are often alone at home even when the parents are at home as well.

What can parents do? There are a number of things.

1. Maintain a strong positive relationship with their children. Have regular conversations about the child’s activities, school, homework, thoughts, fears, direction in life, goals, aspirations and so on. Show the child she is important and loved.

2. Turn off the TV, computer, telephone, MP3 player and Ipod at meal times and talk.

3. Learn as the children learn. Grow as a parent as they grow as children.

4. Never be afraid to show emotion; never be reluctant to show love.

5. Always be willing to admit being wrong and always be willing to say “I am sorry”.

6. Always be willing to say, “I don’t know the answer to that but I will find out”.
7. Know where your children are at all times.

8. Hold age appropriate discussions with your children about the dangers of the internet.

9. Limit computer time and ensure homework and chores are satisfactorily completed before computer time is allowed.

10. Make sure your computer’s software filters out as much pornography as possible.

11. Monitor what is happening on the computer – what sites are being visited, the types of conversations and e-mails and who the internet friends are.

12. If you cannot monitor your child’s computer activity, install a software program that will.

It is better to know what is happening and be able to stop it than it is to punish yourself for not doing so as the police are searching for your child.